Thursday, March 31, 2011

Golfer in Chief

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Air Show Disaster Photo



Air Show Disaster




Amazing photos show great detail.



The pilot at low level had no control over his aircraft. It narrowly misses a crowd gathered for the air show and slams into four buildings.



One can only imagine the horror of the occupants inside those buildings.




Photo below:










Monday, February 21, 2011

Thursday, February 17, 2011

UNVEILING


With breathless anticipation the crowd awaits the unveiling of the Obama statue.

Monday, February 14, 2011

New Ambulance in Phoenix, AZ


Coming soon to your city or town!

Thursday, February 10, 2011

A Bumper Sticker

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Cold Weather - On It's Way

I just got off the phone with a client in northern North Dakota near the Canadian border.

He said that since early this morning the snow has been nearly waist high and is still falling.

The temperature is dropping way below zero and the north wind is increasing to near gale force.

His wife has done nothing but look through the kitchen window and just stare.

He says that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in......

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Thanks Bartender

A guy goes into a bar, there’s a robot bartender.

The robot says, “What-ull you have?”

The guy says, “Martini.”

The robot brings back the best martini ever and says to the man, “What’s your IQ?”

The guy says, “168.”

The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration and medical technology.

The guy leaves, but he is curious so he goes back into the bar.

The robot bartender says, “What-ull you have?”

The guy says, “Martini.”

Again, the robot makes a great martini gives it to the man and says, “What’s your IQ?”

The guy says, “100.”

The robot then starts to talk about Nascar, Budweiser and John Deere tractors.

The guy leaves, but finds it very interesting, so he thinks he will try it one more time..

He goes back into the bar. The robot says, “What-ull you have?”

The guy says, “Martini,” and the robot brings him another great martini.

The robot then says, “What’s your IQ?”

The guy says, “Uh, about 50..”

The robot leans in real close and says, “So, you people still happy you voted for Obama?”

Friday, January 14, 2011

Monday, January 3, 2011

Questions

A young Arab asks his father:


- What is this weird hat that we are wearing ?


It's a "chechia" because in the desert it protects our heads from the sun !


- And what is this type of clothing that we are wearing ?


It's a "djbellah" because in the desert it is very hot and it protects your body !


- And what are these ugly shoes that we have on our feet ?


These are "babouches", which keep us from burning our feet when in the desert !


Tell me, papa...


Yes, my son?


Why are we living in Racine Wisconsin and still wearing all this shit?

Monday, December 27, 2010

What is a good samaritan supposed to do?

I saw a Muslim extremist fall into the Rio Grande River this morning; he was struggling to stay afloat because of all the guns and bombs he was carrying.

Along with him was an illegal Hispanic who was also struggling to stay afloat because of the large backpack of drugs that was strapped to his back.

If they didn't get help, they'd surely drown.

And being a responsible citizen, I informed the El Paso County Sheriff's Office and Homeland Security .

It is now 4 PM . and they still haven't responded.

I'm starting to think I wasted two stamps.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Breaking news!!

Barney Frank resigns from Congress to pursue dream job with TSA

Monday, November 15, 2010

Don't ask, don't tell uniform



Barney Frank introduces the new "don't ask, don't tell" uniform.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Hottest Toy of 2010

Be the first one on your block...

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

BRIEF, BASIC EXPLANATION OF GOVERNMENT

There are four ways in which you can spend money.


You can spend your own money on yourself. When you do that, then you really watch out what you’re doing, and you try to get the most for your money.


Then you can spend your own money on somebody else. For example, you buy a birthday present for someone. Then you’re not so careful about the content of the present, but you’re very careful about the cost.


Then, you can spend somebody else’s money on yourself. And if you spend somebody else’s money on yourself, you’re sure going to have a good lunch!


Finally, you can spend somebody else’s money on somebody else. And if you spend somebody else’s money on somebody else, you’re not concerned about how much it is, and you’re not concerned about what you get. “”And THAT is GOVERNMENT””

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Patriot Parade


Kay and her Mum.

Monday, October 25, 2010

QUICK HISTORICAL FACT

Interesting piece of history relating to the condom:

In 1872 the Arabs invented the condom, using a goat's lower intestine.

In 1873 the British somewhat refined the idea by taking the intestine out
of the goat first.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Let's Be More Tolerant

I am perplexed that so many of my friends are against a mosque being built near Ground Zero. I think it should be the goal of every American to be tolerant. The mosque should be allowed, in an effort to promote tolerance. That is why I also propose, that two gay nightclubs be opened next door to the mosque thereby promoting tolerance within the mosque. We could call the clubs "The Turban Cowboy" and "You Mecca Me So Hot". Next door should be a butcher shop that specializes in pork and have an open barbecue with spare ribs as its daily special. Across the street a very daring lingerie store called "Victoria Keeps Nothing Secret" with sexy mannequins in the window modeling the goods. Next door to the lingerie shop, there would be room for an Adult Toy Shop (Koranal Knowledge?), its name in flashing neon lights, and on the other side a liquor store, maybe call it "Morehammered"?

Monday, October 18, 2010

Arizona County Sheriffs Entrance Exam

Arizona County Sheriffs Entrance Exam

A man in Arizona looking to join the Maricopa County Sheriffs Dept. was being interviewed. The Sergeant doing the interview says, "Your qualifications look good, but there's an attitude suitability test you must pass before you can be accepted." Then, sliding a Smith and Wesson 45 pistol across the desk, he says to the man, "Take this pistol; go out and shoot six illegal aliens, six meth dealers, six Muslim extremists, six 'Progressive Liberal' democrats, and a rabbit."

"Why the rabbit?" the man asked.


"That's the attitude we're looking for!" said the Sergeant, "When can you start?"

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:

  1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.
  2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
  3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
  4. A dog's parents never visit.
  5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
  6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.
  7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk..
  8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
  9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"
  10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.
  11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.
  12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.
  13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.
And last, but not least -- If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

To test this theory:
Lock your wife and your dog in the garage for an hour. Then open it and see who's happy to see you.