Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Questions That Haunt Me

If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?

Can you cry under water?


Why does a round pizza come in a square box?


What disease did cured ham actually have?


How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?


Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?


Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?


If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?


Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?


If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?


If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?


If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?


Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?


Why did you just try singing the two songs above?


Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?


Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?


Do you ever wonder why you visit and read my site OR what my IQ is?

3 comments:

Tony Ramone said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tony Ramone said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tony Ramone said...

Funny stuff, there are a few that are better than others, but most of them are pretty good. I have always loved the one about the Professor on Gilligan's Island.

Sorry about the deletions. I seem to be a typo machine today/