Tuesday, February 22, 2022
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Friday, October 11, 2013
Medicare, Part "G"
You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do?
Our plan gives anyone 65 years, or older, a gun (G) and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians.
Of course, this means you'll be sent to prison, where you will receive three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating and air conditioning and all the health care you need. Probably even cable TV...
Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That's great. Need a new hip, knees, kidney, lungs or heart? They're all covered.
As an added bonus, your kids will come and visit you more often than they do now.
And who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you they can't afford for you to go into a home.
And, you can get rid of four useless politicians while you're at it.
Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay income taxes anymore.
Our plan gives anyone 65 years, or older, a gun (G) and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Politicians.
Of course, this means you'll be sent to prison, where you will receive three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating and air conditioning and all the health care you need. Probably even cable TV...
Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That's great. Need a new hip, knees, kidney, lungs or heart? They're all covered.
As an added bonus, your kids will come and visit you more often than they do now.
And who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you they can't afford for you to go into a home.
And, you can get rid of four useless politicians while you're at it.
Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay income taxes anymore.
Is this a great country or what?
Thursday, October 10, 2013
$634 MILLION
The oBama administration spent six hundred and thirty four million dollars to bring us this.
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
NEVER STAND IN LINE AGAIN
Some men carry and handle their diplomacy better than others........
When former U.S. Military commander in Afghanistan , Stanley McChrystal, was called into the Oval Office by Barack Obama, he knew things weren't going to go well when the President accused him of not supporting him in his political role as President.
"It's not my job to support you as a politician, Mr. President, it's my job to support you as Commander-in-Chief," McChrystal replied, and he handed Obama his resignation.
Not satisfied with accepting McChrystal's resignation the President made a cheap parting shot. "I bet when I die you'll be happy to pee on my grave."
The General saluted. "Mr. President, I always told myself after leaving the Army I'd never stand in line again."
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Monday, August 19, 2013
President Obama hits the golf course... again...
Like Tiger said, "Not bad for a guy who only hits the links 5 or 6 days a week."
Friday, August 16, 2013
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
The Last Nickel
A man entered a restaurant with his very young son. He gave the boy three nickels to play with to keep him occupied.
Suddenly, the boy was choking, turning blue in the face. The father realized the boy had swallowed the nickels: He began slapping him on the back. The child coughed up two nickels, but continued choking. Seeing his son in such distress, the father panicked and shouted for help.
An attractive, serious-looking, lady in a dark blue business suit was sitting at the coffee bar reading a newspaper and sipping coffee. She looked up, put the cup down, folded the newspaper neatly, placing it on it on the counter, rose from her seat strutted stylishly unhurried, through the restaurant.
Reaching the boy, she carefully removed his pants; took his testicles in her right hand and started to squeeze, twisting, gently at first, and then strongly. The lad convulsed violently and coughed up the coin, which the woman deftly caught with her free hand.
She released the boy's testicles, handed the nickel to the father and walked back to her seat at the counter without saying a word.
When the man was sure his son has suffered no ill effects, he went over to the lady to thank her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that; it was fantastic. Are you a doctor? "
"No," the lady replied, "I'm with the Internal Revenue Service."
Suddenly, the boy was choking, turning blue in the face. The father realized the boy had swallowed the nickels: He began slapping him on the back. The child coughed up two nickels, but continued choking. Seeing his son in such distress, the father panicked and shouted for help.
An attractive, serious-looking, lady in a dark blue business suit was sitting at the coffee bar reading a newspaper and sipping coffee. She looked up, put the cup down, folded the newspaper neatly, placing it on it on the counter, rose from her seat strutted stylishly unhurried, through the restaurant.
Reaching the boy, she carefully removed his pants; took his testicles in her right hand and started to squeeze, twisting, gently at first, and then strongly. The lad convulsed violently and coughed up the coin, which the woman deftly caught with her free hand.
She released the boy's testicles, handed the nickel to the father and walked back to her seat at the counter without saying a word.
When the man was sure his son has suffered no ill effects, he went over to the lady to thank her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that; it was fantastic. Are you a doctor? "
"No," the lady replied, "I'm with the Internal Revenue Service."
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Monday, August 12, 2013
Friday, August 9, 2013
Ammo shortage
Folks, The situation on getting ammo is getting really tight, but this morning I lucked out and was able to buy two boxes of ammo.
I placed the boxes on the front seat and headed back home, but stopped at a gas station where a drop-dead gorgeous blonde in a short skirt was filling up her car at the next pump.
She happened to notice my two boxes of ammo, bent over and leaned in my passenger window, and said in a sexy voice, "I'm a big believer in barter, old fella. Would you be interested in trading sex for ammo?"
I thought for a few seconds and asked, "What kind of ammo 'ya got?"
Monday, July 29, 2013
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Sunday, July 21, 2013
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